There are so many things that happen in life, I'm not sure how I'll be able to write all the lessons down, but sometimes, we just have to find a means of relieving our stress. What better way can I use than to write down the positives and hard lessons so others can avoid my mistakes?
1: Notice the Good Things.
If I don't take the time to notice the good things that are happening in my life, I go completely insane. The sadness gets the best of me and brings me down to what feels like the furthest I could ever possibly take. We're all going to experience times of high stress however old we are. Whether it's a huge school project, finals, work report, meetings, certifications, dinners, family, etc...there's always going to be something that's going to go wrong. But, we have to remember that without the hardships we wouldn't be able to know the difference between sadness and happiness. Choose to have the better attitude and see the good. Realize how blessed you are to live in such a great place where plenty of opportunities are thrown at you to try! Be happy that you have food to eat every day, and clothes to wear. Be thankful for your friends who you know are always there and encourage you to keep trying. Rejoice in the fact that you have a religion, or a belief, that makes you who you are and helps you get through the tough times. No matter how many bad things happen to us, there will ALWAYS be something good we can hold on to.2: It is Perfectly Okay to Cry.
For the longest time, I was afraid to cry. I felt that if I cried, I showed weakness and vulnerability. It wasn't until recently in my life that I realize crying is a natural emotion and it's a way that we relieve our built up, or just overbearing, emotions. Alex, my brother who is currently serving a mission in CA, wrote me a couple weeks ago and said, "Sometimes it's good to cry, just don't mope on it." It's definitely true that it's okay to cry, but when we start to mope and drag out our distress, that's when it becomes problematic. Let yourself be sad for a while; it's healthy! Just know when to stop and start to be happy again.3: What is Meant to Happen, Will.
We can't let ourselves stress out about the future, especially when it's impossible to control every second. I know for control freaks like myself that can prove the most difficult of challenges, but as my best friend has taught me: "Just go with the flow." When it's out of our control, we have to trust that if it's meant to happen, it will. Otherwise we'll spend our whole lives wishing and waiting and being disappointed when our hopes don't always when we'd like them to. Be patient and live life to its fullest in the meantime; trust me, you'll thank yourself in the future if you learn that lesson now.4: Think Before You Speak and Act.
Just like the saying, "If you don't have something nice to say, don't say anything at all," We all should think before we say something. Words are powerful things, and once you say them they're nearly impossible to forget. I know I've said plenty of things that I wish I didn't, and I've had some very hurtful things said to me. Words like that can ruin friendships for a very long time, and sometimes even for forever. Actions often speak louder than words. I remember being in high school, walking down the street with my younger brother having a really great time. Not much later, a former friend of ours drove by with a couple others in the car. Next thing we knew, we were covered in raw eggs. My brother and I looked at each other as our classmates drove away, laughing. We noticed that one egg had not cracked and lay in the grass. I quickly picked it up to retaliate, but my brother stopped me and grabbed my hand gently. "Don't make it worse than it already is." I looked at him, nodded and dropped the egg on the ground. Don't let yourself be the one who's causing harm; if you truly care about the people you surround yourself with, show them and treat them nicely. Now, I understand that we all have our bad days where we wake up on that wrong side of the bed. I also know that no one here is perfect. We are all far from perfect. So, for the next lesson...5: Learn How to Forgive Yourself and Others.
Forgiving yourself for mistakes that you've committed in the past is probably one of the best things you can do to let go of those huge burdens a lot of us carry around. Forgiving others can also do the same. While many agree that forgiving others proves much easier than forgiving yourself, I'd like to switch that statement up a bit. Think of a time where you've said something terrible to someone. Generally, you can eventually humble yourself enough to apologize and work it out, then feel pretty good about yourself once again. Now, think of a time where someone has said something terrible to you. How hard is it to forgive them when they haven't apologized yet? I will tell you personally that it is a huge waste of time and energy to hold a grudge. My best advice is to just let it go. I understand that people can be cruel and you can feel very hurt by that. But holding a grudge will change who you are and in turn affect everyone you associate with. Sometimes it can even get in the way of a relationship with someone you love. So, as the famous Beatles song advises: Let it Be.6: Choose Your Friends Very, Very Carefully.
First, I have to say, be nice to everyone you meet. Develop many friendships and associate yourself with loads of new and unique people. But, when you start to become close friends, watch out for those qualities that you can't avoid that will inevitably change you and what you stand for. At the same time, don't be too picky with who you are friends with, otherwise you'll end up with none. One really important thing I want to get across is that the friends who would leave you empty handed and alone in your time of need, the ones who encourage you to do terrible things and hurt others, probably aren't real friends. Watch out for the ones who just want to harm you and manipulate you, the ones who will push you down again and again.7: Someone Will Always Be There.
In some of my most distressing times, I have often felt alone. What I hadn't realized then and know now is someone is always going to be there if you ask them to be. The key is asking. A lot of people may not know you're suffering through difficult times, and you can't expect them to always notice that you're feeling more down than usual. Do not be afraid to ask. It can be anyone: your parents, boyfriend/girlfriend, best friend, brother, sister, God, counselor, coworker...give people more leniency and just let them know when you just can't do it anymore.8: Love.
Love unconditionally. Don't hold yourself back. I understand that it's heartbreaking at times, I understand that it's hard. But, you never know when someone else needs that love that you can offer. Some of the happiest times that you will ever have in your life will be with the people you truly love. Don't hesitate to show them and tell them, because you never know exactly when they'll be taken away from you. If there's anything that I want to take away from this life, it's the ability to love everyone. It's a struggle, but through humility and meekness, it is possible! Be that person who is lifting others up, who is giving them hope to get through their toughest times. I promise you, it will make you feel so much better when you're struggling through life.These are only 8 things. I can tell you that I've learned plenty in this past week, but those are what I feel are the most important. We're always going to learn things throughout our lives, sometimes the same thing over and over again, but we have to remember to be happy. These struggles help us grow, they teach us who we are and who we're meant to be.
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